Sweetest Child

“One may have to let go his/her most beloved self for his/her own good”
I thought what crap. But that day…

...when I closed my eyes,
I delved deep within myself, exasperated.
I saw a world of facets,
some bruised and a few tainted.

I went for another fall,
looking for the one.
There it was, innocent and sweetest of all.
So pure and second to none.

It drenched my soul,
with joy and bliss.
Sweet as a sugar bowl,
and I gave it a kiss.

I was careful, as ever,
with my softest touch.
Try, as I may, but
I can never love it much.

But now it’s clipping my wings,
eating from within, for a hollow me.
Wounding my soul, painful flings,
Heavens! I want to break free.

Nothing again! It feels dejected.
Wings fluttered, driving me wild,
This is it; I’m on my way,
on my way…
to slay my sweetest child.

The Rule

Don't take your victory for granted, even if you are on the verge of winning, ever.

Because, you might have missed out on the rule.

Serene air,

Fragrance of bliss,

Grace in his walk,

And a gory hiss,

Conflicting psyches,

He threw ‘em all,

Elegant, his walk again,

But fate, a self brawl,

Sweet intent,

All both could wish,

Pleasant venom-divine,

But a near miss,

Unjust decree,

With truth so cruel,

Lost the game, again,

Beaten by the rule.

The Saga: Part 2 - After Burn

I’m feeling a pain that has no cure,
for a decade and more,
without taking a breath and with no time to rest,
I’ve been running for sunshine in the sunless forest,

It’s getting harder and the maximum that one could feel,
hear me scream, it isn’t showing any signs to heal,
I can feel my vitals switching off,
my skin is ripping, the pain is trying to peel it off.

The floor is all soaked as I crawled into the dark,
these bloodstains are more, not just ceaseless marks,
the darkness is staring at me like a starving werewolf,
I don’t know what to do, tell me what I should?
the beast, in full command, came chillingly close,
helpless, my soul began to froze,
soon it ended my search for an amulet,
I neither find the luck nor the silver bullet,

I laid there defeated, my body barely moving,
my blood still pouring, from the hole that is gaping,
I’m feeling like a caged soul, "set me free",
I waited for the response, but there was endless silence,
and I roared heavily again, "shoot me".

The strings of fate are strumming hard over the fret board of time,
and some unworthy freak is singing the lines of mine,
I can’t stand this; someone take this virus out,
my head is about to blast but I know I have to last,
may be I’ve to bear it all, may be this is my only way out,

A full pint of blood dripped from my eyes,
now I’m all done after countless wasted tries,
I’m still searching for that one trait, one factor,
and for god sake, just let me loose it, I’m not a bloody actor.

I keep wondering what I’ve done so nefarious?
It has to be the destiny that denied the bond between us,
Now every song I hear reminds me of my time with you,
please don’t cry for me, I’m crying enough for two,

The sounds are killing me, coming from the pied piper,
but I have to move on and need to decode the cipher,
I know this heart desired for more,
more than one could ever be rewarded,
just stay in your world girl and don’t get me started,

This tale, no matter how wretched it may seems,
these dead letters can’t depict the real boulevard of broken dreams,
my soul is fainting trying to gather the remaining life,
It’s the aftermath, the saga of unheard cries.

The Saga: Part 1 - A Perfect Decade

You carry away with you a part of me,

a reflection of me…

If I loved you, it must be because at some time,

We both shared same feelings, same emotions, same stage…

It was September, autumn of ’97,

The breeze was easy, cool and nice,

She was standing on her porch,

Eyes glittering bright,

I was drowning in the most blissful of sights,

She was truly an angel from the paradise.

A mere glimpse of her’ could take my breath away,

I waited ages for her glimpse everyday,

So that by any fate, I could find the nerves,

And say to her, what I ever wanted to say,

I don’t know why I waited so long,

For one moment, that never came,

Instead came the moment, when I have to leave,

Leaving behind those ever cherishing memories, those moments of bliss,

I wish you could know, how it feels, having been denied your sweetest plea.

All these years, my feelings, my thoughts,

Just amplified the pain,

And all those heartbeats passed away in vain,

Fighting within, trying to get the best of the beast,

I kept my faith going, even in the most thunderous of sleets,

My friends, they told me,

“Look bro! These distant relationships,

Usually don’t work out”,

I felt my face smirking,

I wished they could know how deep is this urge, this sprout.

They say love is eternal, a special bond, poetry of senses,

Then why couldn’t she listen to the melody of dissonance;

coming straight from my heart, from its broken pieces,

I always wished she could know, how much I loved her,

How strong is her softest whisper….

I thank her, for being there in my dreams, every night,

Probably it’s the only thing I’m left with, that ounce of delight,

I was crushed at every doorstep, to say the least,

I fought hard, down to my last breath,

But I couldn’t kill the beast,

To pick the ultimate stairway was tough,

But I went for it,

To total the wasted time of utter guff,

Or may be I’m not blessed enough.

Ah! It’s September again, but this is 2007,

And here I’m,

Remembering her shimmering eyes, her wholesome grace,

I’m trying hard but couldn’t forget that pretty face,

She’ll never know, what I ever wanted to say,

I have this desire burning deep inside, since we separated,

I heard something in my heart, sound of a bell,

I’m thinking to myself, this can’t be heaven but can surely be hell,

The breeze is as pleasant as ever under the velvet sky,

Autumn is at its paramount, no traces of sigh,

Here I’m recalling the memories from the past,

Trying to find my long lost facet,

With a broken heart, wrapping up, a perfect decade.

©2009 Conflictable Creations | by TNB